February 27, 2004
What A Week
Life Marches On
By Fred H. Arm
This has been one of the few weeks that I can recall where such interesting and diverse happenings are unfolding in the world. As we speak, a major scandal is brewing that will break any second now--Howard Stern was bounced off the air for indecent language; Mayor Newsom has the gay-lesbian wannabe married couples making appointments to be married; Mel Gibson’s controversial religious horror movie was released (on that hot movie-going holiday, Ash Wednesday); US government officials removed restrictions to travel to that exotic Mediterranean alternative, Libya; and at the same time tightening up on Cuba. (I would assume that the refugees navigating their way to Miami in their rubber-ducky inner tubes and water wings were seen as a growing threat). Federal Reserve Bank honcho, Alan Greenspan touched that forbidden third-rail of politics by suggesting a reduction in Social Security, Ralph Nader blew everyone away when he again stepped into the presidential race, and George W. is clamoring for a controversial anti-gay marriage amendment to the Constitution. And let us not forget that Murphy was creamed at the Richmond City Council with his wimpy appeal to over-rule the Planning Commission’s ruling for his Mac Mansion project. Whew!
All this excitement is reminiscent of a curious statistic: Ostensibly, 1 in 40 American men are prone to wearing women’s clothing. Since we have had over 40 presidents in the United States, statistically speaking of course, one of them could easily have been secretly prancing around the Oval Office in a prom dress. I wonder? Hmmm.
It has also been reported that the astronauts at the international space station had a clothing malfunction. Of course, NASA is accustomed to this sort of problem. When they first sent astronauts up to space, they found that ballpoint pens would not work in zero gravity. Our dazzling leaders then appropriated millions of dollars over a 10-year period to develop a pen that could write in zero gravity, upside down, on any surface and at temperatures below freezing and above boiling. How handy! The Russians, more modestly just used a pencil.
So that is the kind of week it has been. Oh well, I guess it will be really quiet next week.